I liked floor_mice’s post so much I thought I’d translate it for the non-Russophones among us:

Not long ago we discovered a neighborhood… park? Well, a well-kept area under high-voltage wires, anyway, much like similar places in Russia where dog-lovers and pets walk their leashes. The difference is that throughout the “park” winds an asphalt path, the grass is mowed, the blackberry bushes are thoughtfully trimmed into little round islands so that you can pick the berries just by strolling around, without having to push through the brambles.
As you enter the park there’s a plywood board with simple rules: no alcoholic beverages, no fires, don’t let your dog off the leash, and be sure to pick up the… products of metabolic activity. And there’s a little roll of clean new black plastic bags, and all through the park are placed bins where the bags can be deposited when full.
All this is just setting the stage; the story follows.
So today I’m walking my basset hound; she’s as timid and shy as a gazelle girl from the Smolny Institute, so as soon as we catch sight of another dog with its master, we want to know whether they’re friendly.
Coming towards us is a short, elderly gentleman, in a snow-white, ironed silk shirt, pants with a sharp crease, and Italian shoes. (Those who live in the States will understand why I stress these details of his clothing.) He’s walking a huge, magnificent, almost black Alsatian. Ears – THIS big! Muzzle – THIS big! Tail – Budyonny‘s shaggy saber.
Naturally, I want to find out from a distance whether they are friendly to sausage-dogs and other representatives of the animal kingdom, so I inquire. To which I immediately get the question: “What’s your native language?” Without a moment’s hesitation, I brazenly respond: “Russian, what’s yours?”
“You know,” the gentleman says politely, “I was born in Manchester and my wife is French, and at home we speak only French, so my dog doesn’t understand English words.”
“Oh, how well I understand,” I say. “My dog doesn’t have a clue about English, but in Russian she even gets the intonation.”
“What city in Russia would you be from?”
“I’d be from Leningrad,” I answer.
“Ah, so you too are from Europe!”
“Yes,” I say intelligently, “we’re practically neighbors on the map of Europe.”
“Do you know the word nostalgie?” he suddenly asks me.
“And do you like America? – you can say what you think, it won’t offend me either way.”
“I’m quite comfortable here, thanks,” I say.
“You know, I don’t care for it. I’ve lived here 45 years. Before it was all right, but now I’m always dreaming about Manchester. Nostalgie
“Maybe it’s not America? Maybe you’re longing for the time when you were young?”
“You know,” he says, “my children have grown up here and graduated from college, I have a nice house, a beautiful car, money… but my wife speaks French in her dreams… she’s French, you know… and I dream of Manchester, I play children’s games there…”
Nostalgie,” I say.
“Yes, my dog doesn’t understand a word of English,” he says, and his eyes swim away to Manchester.
“Mine too,” I say.
“Language is our nostalgie,” he says.
He takes my hand and presses it in his weak old-man’s handshake, like the touch of a child, and says something to his dog in French, and they go out by the path along which we’d just arrived.
“Well, let’s go home,” I tell my little sausage in Russian, and we leave the park without looking back.

Thanks to Tatyana for the link and for her help with Russian, and to Bonnie for her help with English.

Update (Dec. 2023). Alas, the linked post was not saved by the Wayback Machine, and the few snapshots of the blog don’t go past April 5th, 2005. I guess the original is unretrievable.


  1. Beautiful story, but who was this guy? How many Englishmen emigrated to the Soviet Union in 1960?

  2. No, no, they’re in America — he’s just comparing the park to one in Russia (the American one is similar but nicer).

  3. No direction home.
    I understand even though I only speak English, have only lived in the US, Great Lakes, Western Desert, East Coast. I feel the nostalgia for the words.
    I will always perversely call it pop, even though it is soda everywhere else. Strange how a pointless word can feel so vital.

  4. Sadly missing from the translation is the author’s playful gift for word creation: “little sausage” only begins to gloss “колбассет,” a portmanteau of “kielbasa + basset.” But one can’t have everything.

  5. Yes, that would be nice, wouldn’t? May I interest you in trying your hand on another delightful word, from the comments on this post: таксучка?

  6. “Dachshussy”? Doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue in English.

  7. No, and the play isn’t the same. Not so easy, isn’t it?

  8. I didn’t say it was easy. I said it was sadly missing.

  9. Very evocative passage. I enjoyed it.

  10. And I agreed with you. Now, if translator so desired, he could change sausage to kiel-basset. Up to him.
    Not that either way affects the story much.

  11. Cute. I like it.

  12. of course, you could change dachshussy to Doc’s hussy, but there’s no one named Doc nearby and no sign of his less than socially acceptable girlfriend at all.

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